jesus in a fortune cookie

i had chinese for dinner, and as usual, i was pretty excited to crack open that fortune cookie and see just what wisdom it would impart. i'm not a very superstitious person, but i find humor in the coincidental truth that a random saying in a fortune cookie can sometimes impart to us. my "fortune" today was... "you will soon witness a miracle." my first thought was well, that's a little late. i thought immediately of the miracle that i, along with so many others were so fervently praying for this time last year. i wanted to see my mama healed from the terrible disease that was slowly taking her life. it was getting to the point where i understood that god was going to have to intervene in a miraculous fashion- but i was praying and expectant that he would do just that. well, he didn't. for a while i was a little bit angry about that, well actually, i was REALLY angry. i didn't witness the miracle that i was hoping for, that i thought i so desperately needed.
i was thinking about my "fortune" when driving home tonight, and the song "miracle in me" popped into my head. i know it wasn't a random coincidence, but instead, god trying to prove a point. these are the lyrics:
"Miracle in Me
To be there when the Savior, Spoke with a great command;
And to witness in a wonder, Of His wonder working hand;
No miracle has caught my eyes, To cause my heart to see;
But by faith I'm led to realize, There's a miracle in me.

And I have never seen the thousands fed,
Or the blind made to see;
I have never watched him raise the dead,
But I know when He lifted me;
It's a wonder right before my eyes, Close enough to see;
In my heart is where this wonder lies, There's a miracle in me.

If we have a faith that's measured, By the smallest mustard seed;
All our mountains will be mastered, By the Master of all our needs;
And if we have a child-like trust, He said, He'll do the greatest things;
He will heal the sick, He will raise up the dead, Be a miracle in me."

you know, i wasn't there to hear jesus speak his greatest commandments. i've yet to see him feed the millions of starving people. i know the most wonderful blind five year old, who has never been able to see, and to date- god has not chosen to gift riley with sight. i've stood over the lifeless body of my precious mother, wondering if somehow, god would raise her like lazarus. and, it didn't happen. however, one day, i knelt in an alter, a sinner, deserving of hell- and i prayed to a God who loved me enough to sacrifice his only, perfect, son to pay the price for my sin that i could never pay on my own. he forgave me on that day- he carried my sins as far as the east is from the west, he came into my heart and allowed me to enter into relationship with him, securing my eternity with him when this life is over in heaven. a miracle? yes! the miracle is indeed in me! not in the healing of a temporary body, not in sight, not even in feeding the hungry, BUT IN ME! it's amazing that sometimes it takes death to make us fully appreciate life. i don't think i've ever appreciated this miracle as much as i do now. i don't know how i could have watched cancer overtake my mom's body and steal her life if i didn't have the hope of her salvation and my own. to know that god saw fit to heal her not in a temporal manner, but in a manner suited for eternity! i have the hope and promise that there is so much more than this life, than the here and the now. i have the promise that the goodbye i said to my mama on october 13th was really just more of a see you later. the old song is true, "no miracle has caught my eye to cause my heart to see, but BY FAITH i'm lead to realize, there's a miracle in me.


thank you jesus, for the lessons you teach me through fortune cookies.